Sunshine and Rain

Please.

For once, let me be.
Stop judging me. Don’t be a critic.
Don’t analyse everything I say or do.
Don’t try to reason my feelings.
Please, just let me be.
Im still learning. Im still growing.
I make mistakes and I fall.
Let me learn my lessons.
Don’t mock at me.

I see the world through my eyes,
not yours.
Don’t ask me to agree with everything
which you think is right.

I’m a different person. let me be.
I can’t be you. I can just be me.

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Love can….

When things start falling apart and don’t go where they were supposed to..we are forced to re-examine our life from a step behind and find out how and where it all went wrong.
Where did we sink ? Which path did we take ? Which bridges did we miss ? Which roads did we cross ? How did we end up in this darkness on the top of a steep cliff, where any careless step can be disastrous ?
Why?

And then sometimes, we cant do it all by ourselves. All paths appear hazy, and all bridges appear to be linking the same hills .. Too many cross roads, and no sign of directions.

At that time, we do need a hand, perhaps a shoulder too.
We need a new set of eyes, to look at things from a different perspective and explain the view.
It might take some time to trust that the hand wont let go, or that the shoulder means forever..
But for the heart that believes, love can carry you through the hardest times.

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I Have Loved You.

In the corners of my heart
Are the pieces of your soul
Which you gave to me n’ said
Together we’ll grow old.

In the stillness of my heart
Are the songs you sang to me
I can still hear you say
That we are meant to be.

In the loneliness of my heart
Are the times you held my hand
That you’ll never leave me alone
By my side; you’ll always stand.

In the depths of my despair
In the darkness of my blues
I learn how I dont have a heart
My love. I gave it to you.

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A memory.

What is this life anyway?

A complex plethora of emotions that starts and ends at its own whims.

So fragile. So insubstantial.

One moment, you’re here. The other, you’re gone.

Like thin wisps of smoke into the endless air.

Just. Gone.

And what is left behind?

Mourning hearts and shattered lives.

Empty corridors. Empty wardrobes. Empty beds.

The empty chair.

The unfinished notes….

That locked drawer of secrets? you finally let it go.

The hands you promised to always hold?

They’re bare and cold.

Because you leave them alone.

The many hopes and promises which were unfulfilled?

It matters to those who grieve behind you.

They will remember the things you said.

The colours you liked.

The sound of your laugh.

The way you danced.

or the clothes you wore.

What made you and what broke you.

They are reminded of this everyday of their lives.

Every second.

The empty holes in their hearts will never be complete.

The minute it will try to heal,

Your favourite song will play

and they will go spinning down the memory lane.

There you remain. Hung as a memory.

A photograph, on the walls of time.

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And she stood there.

Overshadowed
Her head hung low
She stood
The long road ahead
Seeming endless
And
Of little value.

The fierce wind
Lapping at her
Cold cheek.
No longer
Could she feel
The breeze singing to her
Or her mesmerized locks
Dancing to its tune.

Little did the sunrays
To warm the frozen heart
And unfreeze
The blood
Now ice.

She will now
Draw into herself.
Complexity
Too difficult
To explain.

What she needs:
A quiet moment
In the restricted world
Of emotions.

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Blossoms

I’m just a tiny bud
waiting to open up
to the world
and reveal the inner flower.
I’m a tender bud
which my mom tends with care
with gentleness and affection
and all the love that is there.

I’m still new to the world
and I need my time
to grow used to the storms
and the bright sunshine.

I’m yet too fragile
and the thorns here and there
Are often too much
and painful to bear.

I curl up and close
as the night draws near
I have a little heart
and the darkness it fears.

I stand all through
Looking out for light
The leaf beside me whispers:
“It will be alright”.

The morning star rises
and so follows the sun
Spreading warmth and sunshine
the darkness Undone.

I shine in the glory
and outside as you see,
A dew drop glistens
And slides over me.

Days pass and nights
of mist and dew drops
of storms and thunder
and rainbows across.

And then finally,
As the morning star always
heralds the Sun,
Today was the day.

The air was so different
And just at daybreak
as I came out of slumber
And Earth was awake,

Something moved inside me
something did change
I could feel the wave
It wasn’t the same.

The petals unfurled
New colours to see . . .
And I blossomed into
The flower in me.

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Sunny Side Up ( for AMBUJ – my lovely lovely brother )

Amby is a big clown
He jumps and shouts
And runs around.

He is a mischief maker
Never listens,
He’s a trouble taker.

He pulls my hair
And pinches me
Makes me run
And climb a tree.

He thinks he has a lot of brain
And that he’s very smart
He is, but has a tummy too
Eats a lot, and then he farts.

He acts like he is super cool
And puts a lot of perfume
He puts his hair in pointy spikes
He loves cars, but not bikes.

He troubles mom a great deal
Doesn’t sit to study.
He gives her all weird excuses
About why he is so muddy.

Oh then he bugs dad too
Spends a lot of money
Thinks he is the king of the world
And buys all gadgets funny.

He’s a pain
Try living with him
He’s a very big bunny.

Now this stupid guy
He loves to drum
And has a set at home.

I can’t sleep, I can’t eat
Because he’s going
Drum dee dum dum !

He plays pranks and loves to scare
Shouts “watch out” and “boo” !

If you see me scared
Away at a corner
You know it was done by whom !

He loves animals
(he forgets he’s one too)
And is very wild at home.

Dirty underwear and smelly socks
Are hanging all over in his room.

He’s got two horns
And is a devil
Don’t mistake him for an angel
With wings that flap.

He’ll smile at you
But you beware !
His smile is just
An evil trap !

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More to the world, than meets the eye.

There are things
Which cannot be seen
But only felt.
Things
Which over time
Have ceased to remain tangible.
Reach out to them
acknowledge them
And then they come to you;
Like dawn, to the night
And rain
To the eagerly waiting earth.
They don’t exist in our dimension
doesn’t mean they don’t exist at all.
They can be as gentle as the mist
Or burning as the fire.
You feel them in the shadows
Or know them by reflections.
They can be the darkness when you are alone
Or the warm feeling when you’re cold
The chill in the spine
Or the heaviness of your heart
Realise them
And you understand all which once, you had called a mystery, a spook or a miracle.

They don’t come to us at the 13th hour
Or when the full moon reflects on the calm stream
They don’t need spells to awaken them
Or magic to charm them.

They are always here
Living amongst us.
Though they may not be alive at all. 

Seeing is not believing
There is more than meets the eye.

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Nostalgia

Today
This cold breath
Carries raw emotion
That, which was
Never expressed.
Nameless
Formless.
And yet,
It succeeds
In stirring
The pain
Which i had
Locked inside
An unknown place.
Time may heal the wounds.
It may calm the raging fire.
But the memory never fades away.

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Choices

How easy life would be, if there were no decisions to make. No options to choose from. Nothing to lose, in order to gain something else.
Life would be a straight journey. No sacrifices, no regrets.
No paranoia, a mind stressed over the wrong path chosen.
Never needing to think, how different life could be. Life would not be different if we didn’t have options. If would be well decided and planned in advance, with us, just puppets in the hands of time. Dust of space.
And then, we would not need a rational mind. No need to think logically. Right or Wrong.
There would be no wrongs. There would only exist the right way.
And we would live away;
at our whims and desires.
No parallel universes, No parallel lives.
Just one fixed, monotonous ride to the grave.

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